Can my husband trust me if I party all night?

Her husband can trust her,
    and she will greatly enrich his life.  Proverbs 31:11


Before I gave my life to Christ, I used to grumble about my husband. He was an active alcoholic then. He did not treat me right. He was mean to me. I ran from him...a lot. I would work as much as possible and hang out all night with my friends, go dancing, get drunk so I could avoid my husband. He's the problem...right? First hint...notice all the me, me me's!


Isn't it amazing who "me" centered life can get?


Even though there were bad things going on with him, I was just as bad. Do I need to go through the list...Ummm, let's see...overworking, avoiding problems, hanging out all night, cruel, mean, self-centered, abusive and let us not forget the drunk part. So even though I could create a list on him, he definitely could create and list on me. Is this one of those, "log in the eye" moments Jesus talked about?


To say all of that, I was not the wife described above. Upon entering the house at 4 am with no phone call of where I was, I gave my husband no reason to trust me. Actually, I was not even thinking about any courtesy to him. I was so focused on me.


So now, as a woman who working to be a woman of God, I see the need to elevate others, especially my husband, above myself. Romans 12:9-10 says, "Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in brotherly love. Honor one another above yourselves." Earlier, Paul even says "Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment" (v3).


That requires that no matter what my husband says or does, (which by the way, he is extraordinary!) "I honor him and show him my honor and respect. If he is wrong, God will take care of it. I need to allow God to do his job. "Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God’s wrath.." (v17-19) Ladies, this is for the husband, the people in our lives, who believe in God and the ones who don't. WOW!


It seems I digress but really I am not. What builds trust? I believe trust is partially built through humility. As I humble myself, get over myself and stop believing the "Veronica hype" that I may be all that and a bag of chips and my needs are MOST important, I elevate others, highlight them and honor them. But first and foremost my husband. Then I will find a husband who will fulfill EVERY need, who trusts me and whose life is greatly enriched. :)